8 Tips for Staying Sane
During the Countdown to Your Wedding
A wedding ceremony isn’t brain surgery, so don’t be a perfectionist about yours. You don’t have to get everything exactly “right.” The truth is, the things that don’t go quite as planned are often what everyone remembers most fondly.
Ask your friends to help. Most of us hesitate to ask good friends to do “menial; tasks – like picking up supplies, delivering stuff to the wedding site, or picking up a friend at the airport. But you would do it, wouldn’t you, if one of your good friends asked you to help – especially in those last two weeks before the wedding. Even major tasks, like finding and briefing the photographer, can be assigned to a good (reliable) friend.
Keep doing whatever you already do to stay in shape and take care of yourself. Whether it is working out, meditation, long hot baths, or Tuesday night poker with friends – just keep it up, as if you had made a solemn vow to do so.
Don’t be afraid to abandon some great idea that you had six months ago that is now turning out to be a huge hassle as your wedding date nears. Some great ideas are worth the trouble, of course; but no great idea is worth it if it drives you nuts and causes more than one serious fight with each other.
Speaking of fights. Weddings take on a life of their own, and there is always pressure, even when you have done a great job preparing. You will probably find yourselves behaving, shall we say, unbecomingly toward one another from time to time. It is highly probable that you will experience conflict. This doesn’t necessarily mean you have been wrong about each other all along.
Time by yourself is a good safety valve. Make sure you get it. Take walks by yourself. Air out your mind. Don’t stop doing this in the last week before the ceremony.
If it is good for you, it is good for your partner. Help him or her get time alone as well. Many people can benefit from having time alone in order to recharge their batteries and to regroup. When they do, they often become more engaged, have greater clarity, and are many times better at communicating.
At some point, perhaps two or three days before the actual ceremony, look at yourself in the mirror and say, “From now on, whatever happens, happens. Let it be.” And then, really and truly, let go. Enjoy the ride. Be surprised. Accept all of it.
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A wedding ceremony isn’t brain surgery, so don’t be a perfectionist about yours. You don’t have to get everything exactly “right.” The truth is, the things that don’t go quite as planned are often what everyone remembers most fondly.
Ask your friends to help. Most of us hesitate to ask good friends to do “menial; tasks – like picking up supplies, delivering stuff to the wedding site, or picking up a friend at the airport. But you would do it, wouldn’t you, if one of your good friends asked you to help – especially in those last two weeks before the wedding. Even major tasks, like finding and briefing the photographer, can be assigned to a good (reliable) friend.
Keep doing whatever you already do to stay in shape and take care of yourself. Whether it is working out, meditation, long hot baths, or Tuesday night poker with friends – just keep it up, as if you had made a solemn vow to do so.
Don’t be afraid to abandon some great idea that you had six months ago that is now turning out to be a huge hassle as your wedding date nears. Some great ideas are worth the trouble, of course; but no great idea is worth it if it drives you nuts and causes more than one serious fight with each other.
Speaking of fights. Weddings take on a life of their own, and there is always pressure, even when you have done a great job preparing. You will probably find yourselves behaving, shall we say, unbecomingly toward one another from time to time. It is highly probable that you will experience conflict. This doesn’t necessarily mean you have been wrong about each other all along.
Time by yourself is a good safety valve. Make sure you get it. Take walks by yourself. Air out your mind. Don’t stop doing this in the last week before the ceremony.
If it is good for you, it is good for your partner. Help him or her get time alone as well. Many people can benefit from having time alone in order to recharge their batteries and to regroup. When they do, they often become more engaged, have greater clarity, and are many times better at communicating.
At some point, perhaps two or three days before the actual ceremony, look at yourself in the mirror and say, “From now on, whatever happens, happens. Let it be.” And then, really and truly, let go. Enjoy the ride. Be surprised. Accept all of it.
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2
3
4
5
6
7
8
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